TEENAGERS!!!!!!! We all love our children dearly and want the very best for them. We watch over them, protect them from things as much as we can, and sometimes we spoil them. But in 2018 things are so much different than how it was when we grew up. I know I know I sound like our parents and their parents LOL. But seriously the world is changing, some good and some bad. We are so plugged in and connected to everything through social media, the internet, and any and everything can be known to everyone. We are being exposed to more injustices, cruelty, and foolery. Now if I can say this as an adult imagine what our kids are being exposed to. When the schools first implemented IPADs I was excited being that they were learning how to use technology and be prepared for the future. However my feelings have changed drastically. We are not always with our children and we hope and pray that while they are not in our presence they make the right choices. But who are we kidding? There is no such thing as a perfect child or person and we were all children and teens once. Some parents forget that when they are standing on their soap boxes giving that wonderful lecture.
We have to find a way to take the negative exposure and turn it into lessons. They may see a video of kids eating Tide Pods and think its funny. But as a parent it is my job to show them the extended version where the kid ends up dead or in critical condition. It is not only the internet and social media. Music has always had some form of influence as well. Some entertainers rap and or sing about selling drugs and how much money they have. Who doesn't want easy money? But again it is our job to teach that for every action and choice their is a consequence.
I have been told that my children are sheltered. At first I disagreed and became defensive. But now as my teenager gets older I am beginning to see that they are sheltered from a lot of things. We try to give them a life where they never have to "struggle" or wonder where their next meal is coming from. On the other hand they are they never see the "behind the scene" work that their dad and myself go through to give them this life. It is my hope that they appreciate hard work, dedication, and the value of money as they get older.
Having African American sons is scary for me as a mother. As I stated earlier we are connected to everything, and with all of the murders and brutality I fear for them. Our conversations are not like others who have not been affected by such tragedies. I have to answer the hard questions and have those tough conversations about why their melanin skin is viewed as a threat when I don't even know myself. It scares me that I can not protect them from those harsh realities. I am proud that my children have friends of ALL racial backgrounds because they know that not everyone is the same. There is negativity in every group of people. We just have to do our part as parents and raise our children to be color blind and treat people based on their character and heart.
With Ashod preparing for high school brings on a lot of changes for us as parents and for him as well. From this point on everything he does will shape his future. He doesn't fully understand that just yet but I am driving the point into his head daily! With getting older comes curiosities about girls, sex, falling into the wrong crowd, drugs and other dangerous activities. This goes back to choices, decions, and instilling the right mindset in our children. Even still we have to have those conversations and discussions. I can not sit here and say I am the perfect mother and have the perfect "talks" with my kids. I do however have my way of getting the point across based on the child. My teens do not take well to calm quiet lectures about right and wrong. Our talks are mostly consisted of me giving examples and letting them know my reaction and the consequence. At the teen stage they are constantly testing their boundaries and I am here for all of it! Ashod says he thinks I enjoy fussing. But that is far from the truth LOL. I just want to make sure he understands that "Mommy ain't no joke!"
We want our children to be better than we are, learn from our mistakes, and be strong. We just have to make sure that we are their to support them, listen, understand, teach, and be there to help pick up the pieces if needed.
Ashod, mommy loves you and I ride you harder because I love you and want you to be the best you!